I usually take out time to look through updates on face book and generally just check on them. Well, about two days ago I realized I had not done that in a long while so I decided to do just that. It was then I noticed a picture was missing. It was of a much older friend who had acted as a mentor some years back. I found it strange considering the person was in the academia and had been a seasoned journalist with years of experience.. It was certainly strange, why would he, out of the blues take off his picture from face book. It never crossed my mind that something could be wrong. Though I had sent several mails last year without response, in my mind’s eye he was probably saddled with work like I was and would in the nearest future respond to my mails but something deep down knew I was not right. So, just yesterday I decided to click on the now empty picture and found the account had been deactivated. I was certainly shocked, it was then it dawned on me that it had really been a while, no blog posts, no updates on face book so between taking out time form work on some projects my curiosity got the better of me. So, clicking on the now empty photograph, it said the same thing. It certainly was so unlike the person I had been communicating with for about five years .Besides he was an intellectual person, a lecturer so he would not just deactivate his account, he usually communicated with his students using the social media. Anyway I decided to just Google to find out, If anything would come up. How true I was, what came up was his obituary, he died a year ago in an accident in one of his travels out of the country. He lived in the United Kingdom.
I was shocked at the same time devastated. It was a huge loss. What a life! As impossible as the news seemed, the reality was right there in front of me. Then I remembered what a colleague had said to me several years back, “Life is separation”. How true it is. It should be more than life pursuits’, not what we can get or gain but how we make an impact on people in the course of life. Besides, what would God ask at the end, definitely not the material goods we have accumulated but how much we have given or offered of ourselves. Honestly, we have some control on how we live our lives so our relationships ought to focus on bringing out the best in everyone we meet. Nevertheless, what we do each day, how we react and treat people every blessed day should count. “Only a life lived for others is a life worthwhile” Albert Einstein. However, if we understand the depth of God’s love for us, showing love will come easy. It is not about choosing those to love. Our daily commitments should not take over the true essence of life, which is RELATIONSHIP. Our relationships form the basis of our existence. It is the real thing about life. Relationships with families, friends and acquaintances should matter and we ought to pour out some amount of care and love in nurturing them.
Though it’s a year now, time may have healed the wound in the family; nonetheless, my heart goes out to the family he left behind and May his soul rest in peace. Mr. Robert Beers you were good mentor.
In concluding this piece, I remember his words of wisdom that formed an integral part of certain decisions I made. Truth is, work sometimes takes over and relationships become difficult to keep but we shouldn’t go through life slaves to work. What I really do know is we only live once, but once is enough if we do it right. Again, life is really simple, we make it complicated because we are all at different places at different times with of course different schedules and like they say stuff always happens. Anyway, the words of Erma Bombeck sums it up “When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left, and could say, ‘I used everything you gave me” ““Death ends a life, not a relationship.”
-Mitch Albom